I think I’ve written about five different posts since the last time I was on here, and I haven’t finished one of them.
In fact, I’ve erased all of them.
Apparently, I’ve lost my touch for having no shame on the internet. Either that or it is because my computer is KILLING ME right now. (read: not operating to my expectations)
I guess it doesn’t really matter why I’ve been a non-poster once again. The point is that I’ve wanted to be more consistent with blogging…. And oh. That’s not happening.
While I’m on here, I may as well tell you the tale of how I lost my wedding band last Saturday.
Somehow my wedding band disappeared between the time that I fell asleep and woke up. I searched everywhere. EVERY.WHERE, I tell you! I’m pretty sure my heart stopped about 10 times due to acute stress and that is when I got really desperate. I asked Helene, the local three year old and infamous collector of small things that nobody else would ever find in a million years, if she knew where Mommy’s ring was. She ventured a few guesses which I found really cute.
The Expert: “Ummmm….. ‘N Helene’s woom?
The Desperate Mess: “Nope.”
The Expert: “Ummmm….. ‘N MommyDaddy’s bed?”
The Desperate Mess: “Uh-uh. Will you help Mommy look for her ring?”
The Expert: “Um, no.”
The Desperate Mess: “Why not?”
The Expert: “Buhcuz, I NOT!” (This was shouted at me and then she sauntered away.)
Well, five-ish hours later, and one house that had been literally turned upside down and shaken, Helene toddles to my room and says, “MommyMommy! You found you my ring! I found you my ring!!!” Her smile lit up our dark hallway as she stretched out her hand to me and I saw my beloved wedding band smack-dab in the middle of her tiny palm.
Oh, the relief! And joy! …And bewilderment?
The Desperate Mess: “Where did you find it?”
The Expert: “Inna cowCH! YAY!”
(This is the crazy part; I looked in that DARN couch TWICE!)
The Desperate Mess: “Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you! You’ve made Mommy so happy!!”
We then celebrated like it was 1999.
Many “yay’s” and “yeah-baby’s” were echoing off the walls.
Then, as suddenly as she had appeared bearing my ring, Helene decides that payment is due. She puts a halt to our party and busts out with, “So-oh Mommy. What we do first?” To this question she wanted no answer. Because one breath later she had decided. “Uhhhhh. How ’bout….. mmmmm… choclit? And…. GAMES! YA-A-A-AY!”
My little lady the opportunist.
I love that she knew she had an “in” to get whatever she wanted.
And I love even more that “choclit” was A-#1 on her list.
Well, Lady got her wish. We hung out and played the fishing game while eating chocolate. Helene was even so gracious as to let Simon join our party. And she had a perma-grin pasted on her face the entire time that her fee was being paid.
So now that you know that disaster was averted and Helene is currently my #1 hero, and go-to-gal for when I lose stuff.